Category: Social Anxiety

Anxiety is tough but sometimes asking for help with your anxiety is even worse.  Here are a few techniques you can start using on your own to help fight your anxious mind.  As always though, check with your doctor first before beginning any new diet and/or exercise.

 

Start Deep-Breathing

1. Sit with your eyes closed and turn your attention to your breathing. Breathe naturally without attempting to control your breath.

2. Be aware of the sensation of the breath as it enters and leaves the nostrils. Place one hand on your belly, and the other on your chest. Take a deep breath for a count of four. Hold your breath for a count of three. Exhale for a count of four. The hand on your belly should go in as you inhale, and move out as you exhale.

3. Concentrate on your breath and forget everything else. Your mind will be very busy, and you may even feel that the meditation is making your mind busier, but the reality is you’re just becoming more aware of how busy your mind is.

4. Resist the temptation to follow the different thoughts as they arise, and focus on the sensation of the breath. If you discover that your mind has wandered and is following your thoughts, immediately return it to the breath.

5. Repeat this as many times as necessary until your mind settles on the breath.

Or try various guided relaxation exercises. Here is an example in the following video:

 

 

Practice Self-Care

Try to get outside in natural sunlight for 15 minutes a day. This is the best way to naturally increase your vitamin-D levels, which can decrease symptoms of anxiety disorders and depression. A short 15 minute break will not only take your mind of stress, but also let you reap the benefits of outdoor activity.  If you’re stuck in an urban area, look for parks or quiet tree-lined streets to take a stroll.

Get a massage, a mani-pedi, or a haircut.  If money is tight, look for a discount salon or a training school which offers quality services for people on a budget.

 

Eliminate Soda or Coffee

That morning cup may jump start your day, but anything with sugar or caffeine will not.
Switch it out for a soothing green tea. Not only does the caffeine jack up your central nervous system, but soda depletes your body of vitamins and minerals and wreaks havoc on your teeth.
Try to drink three cups of chamomile tea a day when you’re feeling anxious

 

Trim the Fat from Your Budget

Financial stress is a common reason people seek psychotherapy. Debt will keep you up at night and contribute to feelings of low self-worth and hopelessness.
Take charge of your finances and stop spending on non-essentials. Track your daily expenses for a week or two and decide where you can cut back.

EXAMPLES:
Switch out your cable TV for Netflix
Contact your car insurance carrier, your cell phone company, or your credit card company and ask to lower your bill.  

 

Get Rid of the Clutter

Do you ever wonder how much time is lost when you can’t find your car keys or your wallet or your son’s lunchbox? Chances are you’ve got too much stuff clogging up your living space.

Try these tips:

1. Choose a drawer, cabinet or closet
2. Categorize the stuff you don’t use
3. Make three piles for a) Items to throw away, b) Items to donate, and c) Items to sell

 

Plan a Day Trip

When you spend time in nature, you give your mind and body a much-needed break. Chances are no matter where you live, there’s a serene, interesting and charming place within a couple of hours.

 

Go to Bed Early

This may sound impossible but this one’s a MUST. Sleep deprivation is a huge anxiety culprit. Inadequate shuteye can increase overall anxiety levels.

Wake up 15 Minutes Early

Like most anxious people, you’re probably rushing around in the morning. Go slowly, and set yourself up for a relaxed day ahead. If you start to worry about your To-Do list, take a deep breath and tell yourself  there is enough time.

 

Get Your Lavender On!

Lavender oil has many healing properties and can be used as a natural remedy to reduce anxiety.

1. Add essential lavender oil to your bath water for a calming bath.
2. Fall asleep quicker when you add a few drops to a tissue and place under your pillow.
3. Use lavender in an oil diffuser to help with insomnia. The sweet woody smell of the lavender oil helps you to fall asleep and stay asleep.
4. For headaches, apply lavender oil to a cotton ball or your fingertips and massage slowly into your temples. The smell will relax you as the oil eases your headache.
5. Lavender is used in aromatherapy massage as a muscle relaxant. Massage the oil into the skin and soothe the muscles of the back and reduce spasms.
6. Lavender can help break up the mucous from nasal and chest congestion that accompanies a cold.
7. Inhale lavender oil to help with pain management, especially after a workout, a therapy session, or surgery.

 

Go Green!

Diet affects anxiety. A morning glass of green juice can get you on the right side of calm.

Try to get between 1 and 3 grams of omega-3 a day. There is some evidence that omega-3 fatty acids may ease symptoms of anxiety disorders and lift your mood by lowering levels of stress chemicals such as adrenaline and cortisol in the body. Canned fatty fish, such as tuna and salmon, walnuts, and flax seeds are all great sources of omega-3 fatty acids.

Add L-lysine to your diet. Studies have shown that people taking L-lysine supplements had reduced symptoms of anxiety and reduced levels of stress hormones. L-lysine is commonly found in meat, fish, and beans, and is also sold as an oral supplement.

 

Know that Feelings Are Not Facts

Negative thoughts cause negative feelings.

 

Challenge Negative Core Beliefs

Remember that thoughts come before feelings. Negative thoughts lead to negative emotions, which lead to negative behaviors.

 

How to challenge your negative mood:

1. Record your thoughts periodically. Pay attention to when you feel stressed out.

2. Write the feelings that accompany the thoughts. Think one-word responses like frustrated, angry, worthless and defeated, etc.

3. Challenge reality. Is there proof you don’t deserve that job promotion? Were you written up because of bad work performance?

If you commit to recording your daily thoughts and feelings, along with reality testing, you’ll see that many of your negative feelings are created in your mind, and not based in reality. The good news is you created the negative thought, and you can stop it.

 

Attend a Social Gathering (Even If You Don’t Want To)

If you’re prone to social anxiety, it’s important to make time for socialization. It’s cool to be an introvert, but know that we live in a universe that revolves around connecting with others.

 

Schedule a Physical Exam to Rule Out a Medical Condition for Your Anxiety

If your anxiety has spiked recently, or if you were previously able to cope with life, and now not so much, your doctor can determine if there’s a medical condition responsible for your anxiety. Ask for blood work, and be honest about your symptoms.

 

Exercise, Exercise, Exercise!

Exercise is nature’s anti-anxiety remedy. Besides clearing the mind and helping you sleep soundly at night, researchers have found that individuals who exercise vigorously and regularly were 25 percent less likely to develop an anxiety disorder within five years.

 

Schedule a Visit with a Therapist

Nobody deserves to feel bad. A qualified professional is your best bet if your anxiety is unbearable. If you are thinking of getting help for your anxiety, please email me at:

eglcsw@eileengrudierlcsw.com

 

REFERENCES
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/anxiety-zen/201405/22-quick-tips-change-your-anxiety-forever
https://www.rd.com/health/conditions/natural-anxiety-relief/

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You know the feeling. That pit in your stomach when you think about work parties or a family get-together. The racing heart you feel when you imagine getting on a plane to visit your in-laws. The worry you have when you think about how many paychecks are left until Christmas day. The trembling and overwhelming dread you feel when you think about cooking all day for several people coming over later.

Anxiety is a fierce reality during the holidays. Not only are people preparing to entertain family and friends at large gatherings or packing for big trips, but there’s also the added stress of not having enough money for gifts or time to get out and buy those gifts as well as so many other anxiety-inducing activities.

Did I get the right present? Will they like it? How will I find time to spend Christmas with my family and also see my significant other’s family? Whose house will I have to go to on Christmas? How long will I have to be there? Where can I park so that I can leave if I feel like I have to? What will I be able to eat during Christmas dinner without feeling nauseated? What if I’m there past my usual bedtime? What if it’s too hot in the house? What if it’s too cold? What if some of the people there are sick? What if it’s contagious? How can I avoid them if they are? Do I have to stay for dessert even though I won’t eat any? How can I get out of this?

 

Signs that the Holidays are Getting to You
Sometimes the signs of holiday-induced anxiety are blatant, but that’s not always the case. Here are a few examples:

Irritability

Some people show their stress by putting energy into trying to fix things. They become irritable, which can make things more stressful by stressing out family and friends.

 

Withdrawal

Another common response to stress is withdrawal, which can cause someone to give up on to-do lists and holiday commitments. This can present as sadness, anger and feelings of bitterness.

 

Other symptoms

People with chronic stress or anxiety may also experience disrupted sleep, an inability to focus or feel scattered. Physical symptoms may occur as well, and include stomach upset, fatigue, frequent colds, muscle soreness and headaches.

 

 

What to Do

Stick to your daily routine as much as possible. This can be tough during the holidays but even doing a few things a day is helpful. For example, wake up at the same time, eat the same breakfast, and write about how you’re feeling every single day.

Prepare yourself to be anxious. There’s no way around it. You’re going to have to go out, be social, and gather with friends and family at places outside your comfort zone. So try your hardest to keep your self-talk positive. Write down coping strategies that help you when you’re most anxious and remind yourself that anxiety is okay.

Focus on family. Thinking about how you can make the holidays great for others can help you get out of your head and concentrate on things that will bring you joy.

Remind yourself that you are surrounded by love. Many friends and family members don’t understand what’s it’s like to deal with anxiety on a daily basis but they are still family. They love you and care about you. And sometimes that’s enough.

 

 

Overcome Your Travel Fears
Holiday travel can also trigger anxiety. People with panic disorder or agoraphobia may find overcrowded airports and train stations overwhelming. Those with generalized anxiety disorder may find a host of new things to worry about while traveling.

It’s important to remember that avoidance will not help overcome an anxiety problem, and it may even stir up other feelings or consequences, such as being the only family member absent from the holiday dinner.

Instead of dreading travel, consider it a chance to practice facing your fears.

Plan and confirm all details. Try to book flights that leave early in the day, when airports tend to be less crowded. Always confirm flight, hotel, and car rental reservations. Allow time to pack so you can organize your belongings and bring everything you need.

Make a list of activities you will engage in while traveling. Prepare for potential anxiety-inducing situations by practicing stress-reducing techniques such as slow, deep breathing, meditation, and progressive muscle relaxation.

Put anxiety-reducing techniques to work. If you have a fear of flying, tell the gate agent or flight attendant when you check in and board.

Ask if you can meet the pilot and copilot. Ask them a personal question, such as “Do you have a family?” Seeing that the people flying the plane are real people can be comforting.

If you have a fear of enclosed spaces, you may want to request an aisle seat so you can get up and move around should you feel the need.

 

Other tips on how to De-Stress
Take the pressure off yourself. The higher your expectations, the more you’re likely to feel let down. Know that some things won’t go exactly as planned and that’s just fine.

Remember that most people aren’t paying much attention to you. You may feel as if people are focusing on you, but in reality, most people are probably wondering what you are thinking of them. Try making a compliment, which can make others feel good, make you feel good, and reduce some stress.

Identify your specific concerns. Are you afraid you will say the wrong thing or embarrass yourself? Remind yourself that although you may feel uncomfortable, that’s the worst that can happen.

Don’t look for relief in alcohol or drugs. Although it can be tempting to take the edge off at holiday events, alcohol and drugs can make anxiety worse and may trigger panic attacks.

Smile, make eye contact, and ask questions. Most people like to talk about themselves and their interests. Ask other people about their holiday plans, what their kids are doing, or what book they’re reading. Avoid topics that can lead to heated discussions and add to your stress.

Choose to say no. Try not to over-schedule yourself during the holiday season. You don’t have to accept every invitation. You may want to eliminate some traditions that cause you more stress than joy.

 

 

If you are finding that the upcoming holidays are bringing you more stress, please contact me at:
eglcsw@eileengrudierlcsw.com

 

 

REFERENCES
https://www.nbcnews.com/better/health/how-keep-holiday-induced-stress-under-control-ncna822546
https://adaa.org/living-with-anxiety/managing-anxiety/managing-holiday-anxieties
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/blog/women-s-mental-health-matters/201512/anxiety-makes-the-holidays-harder%3famp